Day 14 Post Surgery

Saw Ganju on the 28th and he said that he got clear margins but that 7 out of 13 nodes were affected with cancer. Called my cancer ”aggressive” and left the drains in for yet another week.  I am still going strong in drain 1 though drain 2 is almost down to nothing.  Really hurts where the drains are coming out now…..sore in that area. Numb under the armpit and the underside of the left arm.  Stinky at the incision site under the steristrips.  Just geneally miserable and really scared since the term “aggressive” has been used as prior to this it sounded “fixable”.

Day 5 Post Surgery

Bloated and full of gas.  Drain one is going strong yet, drain two nearly nothing. Blood clot string in drain one. Taking pain pills probably got me into the gastrointestinal mess I am in now.

Day 4 Post Surgery

Went with Skye to the falls Pig today for soda, etc and it was a bit too much. Felt it within 5 minutes of arriving but I also picked up some doggie outside too so…….Also got one load of laundry done so that cool blue shirt jacket of Karens is all ready to go for Wednesday. Drain two slowed to a dull roar so to speak and drain one is less bloody but still going strong. Tomorrow will try not to do too much and see if I feel better longer. Need to feel at least a bit better each day now for sure.

Day 3 Post Surgery

This is my 2nd day home.  Last night my blood sugars were a little nuts and I must have overdid it with my household chores as I felt hot and lightheaded for most of the day and night.

Today though Skye helped me get washed up and changed into different clothes. I am still sweating out chemo and thats just gross.  I’m worried about the pathology report and, as of nearly 3pm on the 3rd day after surgery I havent heard squat.

I do have some pain today in that surgery area and one drain is straw fluid while the other is still sadly bloody but at least no clots.  I guess I am just paranoid in general now.  But in general I feel weak as a kitten, tired and kinda distracted.

Surgery — Times 2

surgery was at 2:15 yesterday and everything went fine. came out with one drain and it really didnt even hurt all that much. he said he took the tumor and a sizeable area around it and all my lymph nodes. then about 10pm last night i noticed clotted blood in the drain and called it to the attention of the nurse who called the doctor..he came back to look and informed me that we would be going back to surgery for him to reopen the wound, clean it out, cauterize whatever needed to be cauterized, etc.  I thought for a second he was kidding. By 11pm last night I was back in the operating room having surgery number two. scary part is we dont even know if he got clear margins yet and wont till tomorrow or friday. it would be awfully cruel to require three surgeries on the same breast wouldnt it? I’d need a total mastectomy if he didnt get clear margins however as of 4pm wednesday i am waiting to find out if i go home tonight or tomorrow. didnt sleep for shit here last night at all but i’ve walked the hall for them a couple of times, etc.

Pretty Apprehensive

Its the night before surgery and I am starting to freak out a little.  Took care of Roddy and the fish, the pet bowls, a shower, a final load of laundry, etc.  Trying to keep busy. Taking my vista laptop along so hopefully Skye and I can chat .  Already my boob is hurting, probably sympathy pains or something. Sigh!

Upcoming Surgery

Well the MRI showed that the tumor had shrunk from 2.7 Centimeters to 1.7 Centimeters soooooo I am getting a partial mastectomy on Jan 20th.  He is also going to remove most or all of my lymph nodes under my left arm and I will come home with at least one drain .  I will be kept overnight and its still considered an outpatient procedure.  Ganju also said that the drain is in for about 7 to 10 days and that it takes up to a month to feel “okay” again. So if everything goes as he said I can handle it.

My worries involve the pathology report which wont say if he got clear margins until 2 days after my surgery (repeat surgery is NOT something I wish to experience),  him finding something else during the surgery necesscitating more hell for me,  repeating chemotherapy, and of course the shit coming back.  This is one life experience I do NOT wish to repeat.

Day 21D

Stomach feels quite touchy and twice this past week I almost puked. Once was last night (Christmas) after eating dinner and while still at Karens house (that would have been a disaster) and earlier after eating a single banana. 

I still have almost no energy so I hope no more chemo is required because I feel I have pushed my luck with this phase of my “journey” to the max.

The MRI I had on Monday was interesting.  They hooked me up to an IV in my arm and then put headphones on me and I  had to lie completely still with my tits hanging down into holes on a table for 30 full minutes. Barely made it especially since they made me lie with my head on a regular sized pillow. I’m nervous about the results and will get those in 3 days.

What the heck am I talking about?  I am nervous about everything lately.

Day 10D

All week I have felt as though my stomach was stuffed with cotton…..sounds weird I know but thats the closest I can come to describing the feeling.  Seems Yogurt helps but only on a day to day basis so I may be forced to eat a yogurt or two per day for awhile.  Yogurt does taste a bit odd too so this should be interesting.  Dont need Sienna S or Imodium so I guess thats a good thing. Nostrils and throat dry with occassional cough.

Got Nystatin powder for yeast infection under breasts.

Day 6D

Went for my Neupragen shot today and about 1 hour later felt mild nausea. Still feel like the food in my stomach isnt digesting even though I took one of those little yellow pills.  Right nostril was runny today…god I hope its not a cold.